Introducing John Queue Public, Our Resident Queueing Expert

Here at Aequilibrium, we hate queues. We hate being in them, especially outside if the weather is bad, but we also hate them on an existential level. We even hate that line-ups are called ‘queues’ to make them sound more important than they are. For a long time, we tolerated them because they were few and far between (amusement parks, really). But now, with COVID, it’s clearly gone too far. It’s time to speak out against painful and unnecessary queuing, not just for ourselves but for customers everywhere.

Given the technology available, there’s no reason for queues(!) and it’s about time everyone started becoming aware of how unnecessary lining up is. With appointment setting systems, virtual queues, and even crowd management we can limit and even eliminate queues. 

But talking about it and hating it wasn’t enough. We had to take action. So we searched far and wide (England, obviously, is known as ‘land of the queues’) to find and hire someone who knows queues, and we mean really knows queues, like was born in a queue and raised in a queue—someone who could help us take action. And hire them we did.  

Meet our resident queueing expert the very British, queue-savvy, Mr. John Queue Public. 

Freshly arrived in Vancouver, Canada, he acclimated himself by touring line-ups across the city. From banks to gyms, from hotel pools(!) to restaurants and liquor stores. Shocked and dismayed, he knew his mission: sufficiently poke fun at us poor Canadians for our bad queueing and then educate us on how to eliminate our queues properly. (Read more about our queue management solution here.)

Check out Mr. John Queue Public aka JQP on LinkedIn!

John Queue Public’s mission begins at the beginning of the line

Where to begin on this mission of kindness and time-saving? As any good tactician knows, in order to defeat your enemy, you must know your enemy. And so John Queue Public’s first step is a deep, studious dive into the origins of queueing. 

If we know how queueing started in the first place, we may gain some insight into how to get rid of them. If we know the motivations of the people who told other people to ‘get in line’, perhaps we can help people to tell other people to ‘come at a specific predetermined time and walk right in’; or, if that’s not possible, to ‘walk around and enjoy themselves and we’ll text you or WhatsApp you when it’s your turn.’ In this sometimes cold, rainy, and difficult world, wouldn’t that be queue-bustingly beautiful?

Follow JQP’s antics and queue-busting adventures as he busts line-ups across the city in this exciting Queuebusting video series! Check out the first episode where JQP tries to dig into the history of queuing:

Watch John Queue Public in Episode 1: The Origins of the Queue

Get in touch to learn how you can get rid of your queues and deliver remarkable (and queue-less) customer experiences.